Procrastinating with a difficult conversation that you know you need to have but can’t quite find the right words?
Worried that giving feedback might kickback at you?
Done the ‘difficult conversation’ training but your intuition is telling you that the training isn’t going to get results for this particular conversation?
Try these coaching questions to get a deeper insight into the issues and work out the best way forwards.
1. Rating of 1-10, where 10 is the most confident you ever felt… how confident are you feeling right now about this situation?
2. What do you want X to do differently as a result of the conversation? Be very specific about what you want X to do or say differently
3. What makes this an issue for YOU right now? Be honest about your emotions and fears. Ponder on this question and let your emotions come to the surface
4. What assumption are you making about this person and their behaviour? And what evidence is there to support your assumptions?
5. Put yourself into X’s shoes… imagine being X for a day, what are they doing/thinking? Try to be as detailed as possible as you walk in their shoes for a day. What’s important for X? How do they see you? How do they see their behaviour?
6. What assumptions is X making about you?
7. What does this person need from you?
8. What do you need from this person?
9. What is the next step in moving this issue forwards? Put a note in your diary before it gets lost.
10. Rate between 1-10 again… how confident are you now feeling about this issue right now?
If you find this coaching useful then print off the page and write down your thoughts as you work through your questions. Re-visit it after you have carried out the next step.
“Don’t find fault, find a remedy” Henry Ford
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